can we talk (privately) about something?

I think it's time we address something that's been bothering me for a while. I'm sorry, I can tell you're feeling nervous, maybe even uncomfortable, but I don't think you can even imagine how incredibly uncomfortable this conversation is for me, as well. I really do hate even to bring this up, but...
WHY DOES DUANE READE GIVE ME SUCH BIG BAGS SOMETIMES? I literally have four travel sized items in this bag (one being a twix... but I feel like that counts as travel sized) which is so big it has HARD PLASTIC HANDLES to hold (potentially) heavy contents.

BEFORE YOU START LECTURING ME about plastic bags and the environment, I want you to know that I said yes to a bag ONLY BECAUSE I thought they were going to give me one of those super super small really cute plastic bags, and I really like those!